20 in 2

Warning Signs of the Multi-Event Athlete

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This guide* is intended for use by women who suspect their significant other may be cheating on them - or worse, training for multi-events, and should be used to tell the difference between the two.  The following should be considered serious warning signs that your partner is competing and training for multi-events -- hold your mouse cursor over each Symptom to learn the warning sign:

  Unusually Dark Tan
  Rusty Stains on Collar
   
  Arrives Home Sweaty, Tired
  Raw Nipples
  Consumes 4000 Calories and 1600mg of Ibuprofen Daily
  Welts on Buttocks
  Wears Women's Underwear
  Swollen Testicles
  Lacerated, Dislocated Ring Finger
  Hickeys on Inner Thigh
  Bruises On and Around the Knees
  Shaves Legs
   
  Sandy Socks
  Owns More Shoes than You
  *Other Scratches, Bruises, Raspberries
 

* Dedicated to my ex-wife Dawn Gernhardt, who had to put up with 20 mistresses ranging from the shot put to the 10,000 meters, and to my son Devin, who knows how to throw a javelin but can't tie his shoes.

 

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email Dimitry: dimitry@yakoushkin.com


20 in 2 © 2005, 2006 Dimitry Yakoushkin